Beating Someone Is A Sign of Love?

Denis Nzioka

Yes; Battery is a form of saying ‘I love you’

Here is a scenario that most of us are perhaps familiar with. You are in Tacos and having drinks and a jolly good time. We have many gay guys dancing and drinking and enjoying the company, beer and god music. We have single gay guys, those married, sex workers, virgins and those who are there to look for someone for the night. It happens to be a Friday.

At the corner, amid a raised table are James and John, a gay couple who have been dating for some months now. They are in love and they cannot take their hands and gazes off each other. They have been seeing each other and have made some public appearances together and spend time together. Love is in the air. Their relationship is so known that they have even put it on Facebook. Pictures of them two in various poses and displays of affection shower their Facebook profiles. By taking a look at the comments, you can see how most are positive and wishing them love.

But James is a jealous lover. He has a bloated ego and pride. He loves John so much that he would dare not want anyone else to even hug him. He gets angry easily and has a short temper. John is a care free, fun loving and sometimes crazy person. He loves to drink and dance and he has the killer looks to make a mark. John loves James and James knows it. James loves John and John knows it.

In an instant, we are still at Tacos people, a scuffle ensues. We see James shouting and visibly angry at non e other than John. Apparently, John was seen dancing with another man in a too close for comfort manner. He was seen shaking his waist and dancing in a sexy manner with another man and this was reported to James who we know is short tempered and easily angered. Drama galore!

James then slaps John, yes, slaps him in front of the others much to their shock. Another slap and John hides his face as he tries to reason with James. There are some gay guys who are visibly shocked by this and some who support this saying why should John be so flirtatious or be in the arms of another man yet he is engaged to James?

James continues to beat and slap John and then drags him out of Tacos and onto the streets. Some concerned friend try to break it up but they are told that no one should meddle or mess or try to come in between these two. Such a scenario is played out in many areas and locations.

I have talked to most of my gay friends and asked what would lead a man to beat his lover and yet claim to be in love? I have also talked to those who have been beaten and some say that they welcome that beating as it shows that that man loves you to the extent he would beat you. Huh?

I personally believe that if a man beats you, and for a good reason – cheating on him, disrespecting, or something extreme – then that is a valid. I believe that beating someone is one way of telling them you love them. If your man does not give a fuck about you or does not care what you do or who you do it with, then he is not in love with you. But if he watches over you like a hawk, keeps and eye on you all the time to the point you feel as if he is breathing down your neck, be damn happy! No one who is not in love would do that!

If he is over protective, demanding, authoritative and firm, you should appreciate that very much. Where else can you find such a man?

Conversely, if a man beats you up then it is his way of showing you how much he loves you. If you have been beaten by your boyfriend, you will agree with me that you are happier and fulfilled than before. You are more in love with him than before.

Finally, if I beat up my boyfriend, I love him. I wouldn’t beat him if I did not care about him. If you are beaten or have been beaten, know you are loved that much. And if you have not yet been beaten, push the envelope a bit and piss him off. Let him put his hands on you and experience love and pain, pain and love.

If I were you, I would keep such a man!