THE CONVERSION MYTH

Once a gay man comes out, there are many ways in which the news could be received. The one thing that may happen is that the family and friends may refuse to accept him as he is.

It is because of this very possible factor that there exist organizations like the National Association for Research and Therapy of Homosexuality in the United States that advocate for secular forms of conversion therapy, also known as reparative therapy. Here in Kenya, there are a number of churches which believe that it’s possible for someone to stop being gay by prayer or some form of psychological treatment.

The main problem with the terms conversion therapy and reparative therapy including the entire concept of changing one’s sexual orientation through psychiatric treatment is that it is based upon the assumption that homosexuality per se is a mental disorder or based upon the a priori assumption that a person should change his/her homosexual orientation.

The Gay & Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation (GLAAD), a media monitoring organization that works to prevent the defamation of LGBTI people in the media and  towards public acceptance of LGBTI people states that the term implies that homosexuality is a disorder and should be avoided, a view also held by some psychologists and sociologists. Most conservative Kenyans hold that view too. One person said, “Homosexuality is unnatural and all homosexuals are sick people.” This is unfortunately the kind of mental frame that gay people have to deal with on a day to day basis.

So, let’s consider ‘Conversion Therapy’ and see what it entails. Apparently, for one to be said to have converted to heterosexuality, he or she has to satisfy some five criteria; being in a loving heterosexual relationship during the last year, overall satisfaction in emotional relationship with a partner, having heterosexual sex with the partner at least a few times a month, achieving physical satisfaction through heterosexual sex, and not thinking about having homosexual sex more than 15% of the time while having heterosexual sex.

How does one achieve this? There are several forms of treatment. Not on an organization bashing mission here but one of the methods of ‘treatment’ that these people use is behavioral therapy. Practitioners who view homosexuality as learned behavior may adopt behavioral modification techniques. These may include masturbatory reconditioning, visualization, and social skills training. The most radical involve electroconvulsive therapy, a form of aversion therapy. Radical, don’t you think?

Seems like a feat for any homosexual man or woman. Here are the statistics though. A peer-reviewed study published in 2002, that 88% of participants failed to achieve a sustained change in their sexual behavior and 3% reported changing their orientation to heterosexual. The remainder reported either losing all sexual drive or attempting to remain celibate, with no change in attraction. Some of the participants who failed felt a sense of shame and had gone through conversion therapy programs for many years. Others who failed believed that therapy was worthwhile and valuable. The report also stated that many respondents were harmed by the attempt to change. Of the 8 respondents (out of a sample of 202) who reported a change in sexual orientation, 7 worked as ex-gay counselors or group leaders. (Source: Wikipedia)

Promising results? Not really. Yet these organizations continue to advocate for therapy as a form of treatment for the disorder that is homosexuality. Being gay is not a disorder. For most of us, it’s not even a choice. A question I pose to most people is, why would a person choose to be shunned and rejected by society at large?

We should all embrace our homosexuality. Not be defined by it but be proud to be who we are, that way we’ll live a fulfilling life.

Speaking about conversion, the article was intended to deal with something entirely different. One of the most common stereotype that is associated with gay men is that they want to get in the pants of every man they see. This is not true. Some of us however do end up falling for people who are a tad unavailable. This is usually due to the fact that they are not gay. So, if the Christian organizations believe that they can convert gay people to heterosexuals, why can’t we have a form of conversion therapy for the other way round?

This is essentially what was intended for this article today. Unfortunately, it has already been done. And it has been done so well. The writer has captured everything that was to be included here. Read it. Use it. Beware of the disclaimer however.

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Did you know that May is “Masturbation Month”? Just thought I’d share that information.